21.35

santa is an anagram of satan 

131214  4pm

i seem to be back in my sex addiction 

that magical world ... 

or maybe you are just having a relapse ... 

The Gates

a word of gratitude 

just to say how lucky i was to have that coffee yesterday.

my nephew nearly cancelled it

because he couldn't get hold of his 5 year old.

I managed to persuade him to come on his own

and when i got there he was itching to show me photos of his son

and to talk about him like he was such a proud father.

He then got rather excited showing me a game on his phone

and suddenly i could see the little boy in him

that i used to play with such alot in his childhood.

You know how it is when they hit 13

it seems like the child is gone, but there it was

the child was still in there and i also told him so !

I've ordered 8 wooden gift crates from Waitrose

that they are having difficulty delivering.

They are attractive with a heart shape cut out

i want them for storage boxes

apparently people have ordered masses of them.

I note there is a gap in the market

for attractive storage boxes

that you can stack how you wish

he seems to think you talk on the phone quite alot.

its not necessarily the quantity of time

its just with me i see him maybe a bit more than that

and i often feel i am not strong enough for him

like i can't really discuss the recovery programmes with him

in the way some people would ,

i don't seem to be giving him the inspiration that he needs

which might have to do with my mental illness.

Usually when we get together

we spend the time making jokes

which is fun but is not really getting him anywhere

and i don't feel strong enough to stand up to him

so we make the jokes and then i have to switch off you know

and get back to my own thing

things do not seem to be making any progress.

Also if i am badly affected by him , chances are he is also damaged by the contact

its very bad for him to feel he can affect someone

it reinforces the feeling that the addiction rules ...

love from

hi Auntie

i sometimes feel you are hinting

that i should do more for my brother .

My sponsor suggested i asks people what they mean

instead of trying to guess

love from Liz


Hi

No I don't think that at all. You've always been the main person for your brother and helped and supported him more than anyone. What you are doing is fine. My cousin phoned last night . We chatted about all the family and what they weer doing this year. She wanted to know about you and him  and sends her lovexxx


thanks Auntie

its a great sur prise to me to hear i have made any sort of contribution ! x

ps fancy that . Here am i allegedly a paranoid schizophrenic

leading the way on rehabilitation of drug addicts

whatever next ! x

todays news group

1p to NHS, 1p to deficit : increasing income tax 

i don't think their benefit cuts were that successful 

83 people hold more money than 2.5 billion put together 

90% of the wealth is with 2% of the people 

you have to be very dependent on your family in America

statute du jour 

Surely Farage would not have said that about migrants 

filling up the bus , someone might have made it up 

Jupiter sucks in meteors