water in my shoe 
i got soaked through 

song : a dark time

040817

in a dark time
you can write your name 
in the dust 
rust is spreading 
weeds are growing 
they're taking over 
I'm broke 
n i just don't wanna be here 

its just overwhelming to go through that
and very devastating to my state of mind,
its very undermining to have to spend so much time
concentrating on my weaknesses

240717 

my mother's mental illness
my dad's alcoholism 
and my violent boyfriend 
left me not knowing 
how to talk to people 

the judge is an alcoholic, i.e. not in touch with his feelings, and not all there 


he lists drinking wine as one of his main hobbies ! 

where is the EVIDENCE 

that he no longer enjoys a cuddle in his mother's arms ?

where is the EVIDENCE that he has no quality of life ? 

where is the EVIDENCE that the baby is in pain ?

where is the EVIDENCE that he is suffering ?

i thought we were all about research here in the West

the research could be useful to other babies 

if he is practically brain dead then he would not be too aware of his sufferings.

the burden

170717 / 180717 / 190717 / 210717 

n i just can't walk away 
or wash my hands of it 
like she does 
n i can't duck out 

this terror being all alone 
sitting here on my own 
anger boiling over 
its getting dangerous now 

feeling alienated
like I've lost my soul 

the mental patient 
is getting angry ...