jupitersterrain four

************

its coming back to me now ... 
a sea monster ripping its way up my back 


********************

the air and light forcing its way upwards 

something kicking the lungs like a jet of air pressure 
like being winded by a gale force 

from the stomach so that you're gasping for breath 
i couldn't even remember that at the time 

pains in the 
stomach and buckets of sweat 

and a cry of pain like a grieved child who 
has lost herself in the emotion 

arching back into a bow 
that bends and bends until it snaps 


afternoon 12.04.13. 

mental school continued 

never mind work ... 

the whole idea of doing things was really 
funny being made to do things and 
the difficulty they had making 
us do things 

you'd be lucky to get a game of 
scrabble out of us 

and wed go down through layers
of naffness until you truly did not give a shit 

and the muscles in your stomach coming 
with laughter 

being naff meant that you were no better
than anyone else 

and we all had oilskin coats that look like 
you had slept in them for about ten 
years and canvas bags full of paper and stuff 

kind of a uniform .... 

and a permanent cold virus .... 




**************

a cocksure frontman 

********

and when am i telling you what to do what about 

suggesting things i mean i need to say something dont i ? 

probably its related to that thinky stuff from yesterday or just 

saying too much stuff 

************************

the breast implants kind of suit you 

**************

well i don't know 

and I'm warning yous i got 
very violent feelings about him 

and yeah i can fall in love with alpha male types
but the really top of the tops for me 
had a bit of a feminine side like about 37.5%


***************