jupitersterrain four

111017

people are hostile 

i forgot to take my pills 

n i need to wash my hands 

they are bleeding now 

im so confused 

i was arrested 

going for a wee 

in somebody's front garden 

im so ashamed 

they said i'd exposed myself 

n i look a mess 

inappropriately dressed

apparently provocative 

n now its all a blur

i feel so dizzy and paranoid 

guessing your motives 

how am i supposed to know 

what is appropriate ?

i can try to paint it for you

my oils and brushes are there for me 

but then i walked out of a shop 

n i hadnt paid 

my home is like a slum 

people threaten me 

in the street 

they know I'm vulnerable 

they know I'm isolated 

n im paranoid 

so they can get away with it 

once i sat in a bush 
full of rats 
i cry out in pain 

alone in the streets at night 

i get followed 

n i wanna die 

they say I'm deluded 

n nobody wants to know 

that car nearly hit me 

i wasnt looking where to go 

time for a bin liner 

and my blood red lipstick ...