word jam : a dead rock star

 
 
ive got low self esteem again today

i feel that ive failed as an artist
a professional artist

and ive not sold very much myself
im unemployed ...

made to do drudgery , worthless
cant even go to bed at a reasonable time
what a waste

im feelling a bit shy !
is a good chat up line for me
it puts the other person at ease
and invites them to share
their own insecurities

but i cant contact anyone romantically
until the 20th June

spiralling cork screw
twist it off
 
a cat is to stop you getting addicted
to your computer monster
a kerfuffle of royal furs
 
people keep telling me I'm tough
when they want something doing

my baby n i are bad to each other
 
the author has cut off her nose to spite her face
my sister is harassing me online  

the music sounds all trippy and stuff
like its melting

sitting with loneliness 

and you also felt hurt by her ... 



its very difficult to be close to someone 

and not hurt them 


when people are trying to be themselves 


they will hurt each other 



its not about being a failure



 

im in love with a dead rock star
feeling wobbly 



thanks I like their dances 


it sounds like they are dodging each other !

another technique I learned
when looking at a trauma
is try to make it a black and white film in your head
instead of a colour one

people have been known to climax
at the hands of their abusers , their torturers even
its still an assault  

how about a tv show called Safeword
the actors wind each other up
until somebody calls Safeword