310520 

what colours are going on inside you ? 
im full of the greenery 
going on outside 

some inky violets and purples and pinks 

300530 

you can feel whatever you want to feel here 
nobody will put any pressure on you 
or judge you for them 

300520 

chasing bigger and bigger highs 
until they finally do me in  

a sensible answer 

i didnt know who i was 
i was quite ill for 3 days 

I've enjoyed the slower pace 
and going deep within 
its difficult to come out again 

word jam : the hazy warmth of summer

there were three stone statues

traditionally
a ' damsel ' would be very coy with her suitor 
he might ask her to marry him several times 
before she consent 

he was supposed to be a mind reader 
and to know he wasnt harassing her 

the cold war could be dangerous 
tripping off my box 

basking in a fantasy 
feeling the summer inside, 
the hazy warmth 
relaxing the pain

as if nothing matters, bliss 
losses of sanity at times
feeling paranoid and insane 
but able to come out of it 

mending inner healing  

like a seizure , traumatised 
you can hit a place deeper inside 
n i told you how to do it 

clinging to a log in a stormy sea 

my little boat is sunk  

ECT

take up thy bed and walk 
you are having a fit 

im in shock from the earthquake 

thats knocked the stuffing out of me 
I've lost the plot and gone mad 

I've blown my brains out 

im not worried about dying 
I'm more concerned with how I'm living 

like a giant octopus 

i look like I've been electrocuted 
with my arms and legs 
kicking out everywhere 

enjoying the ugly parts  

the inner teenager
where we get our lust for adventure 
our detachment and our passion 

a fire pit of filth 

the occult 
the live hexing stacks 

if there is any chance 
of you giving your son another sibling 
you should go for it 

tailgating , angel wishes  

its all got too much 

he wanted revenge 
for when i did that to him 
although i didnt know it then 
i wasnt trying to hurt him  

push back the shadows 
I've never done anything to hurt him 

its like there is a drum skin
inside my soul, inside my chest 
being beaten black and blue   

the pain throbbing in my heart 

290520 

the cold war could be dangerous 
tripping off my box 

280520

basking in a fantasy
feeling the summer inside, 

the hazy warmth
relaxing the pain

as if nothing matters, bliss
losses of sanity at times

feeling paranoid and insane
but able to come out of it 

mending inner healing 

280520 

like a seizure , traumatised 
you can hit a place deeper inside 
n i told you how to do it 

clinging to a log in a stormy sea 

my little boat is sunk 

280520 

ECT

take up thy bed and walk 
you are having a fit 

270520

im in shock  

earthquake 

thats knocked the stuffing out of me 
I've lost the plot and gone mad 

I've blown my brains out 

im not worried about dying 
I'm more concerned with how I'm living 

270520 

like a giant octopus 

i look like I've been electrocuted 
with my arms and legs 
kicking out everywhere 

enjoying the ugly parts 

250520 

i suppose yes i do love my ex
he is handsome 
and I'm also not feeling very turned on 

they speak of parent adult child 
always missing out the teenager 
which is quite different from the child 

the teenager
where we get our lust for adventure 
our detachment and our passion 

240520 

really , did you know her pimp ? 

240520 

do you like nice polite ladies ? 

240520

a tortoise
im so behind with stuff I end up rushing my food
and getting indigestion
reminds me of living in a squat where you would rush your dinner
before someone comes in starving and asks you to share it !

not enough ?

there was this friend who trained as a psychiatric nurse    

then became unwell herself 

and continued as a patient 

with the intention of using her skills to help others 

and to recover from her own horrific experiences 

she has lost her trust in men 

and feels that all women would be better off lesbians 

so she grooms younger women 

in the hope of gaining sexual favours from them  

230520 

fire pit , filth 

220520

for instance traditionally
a ' damsel ' would be very coy with her suitor
he might ask her to marry him several times
before she consent

he was supposed to be a mind reader
and to know he wasnt harassing her 

the dark secrets of Little Bo Peep 

210520 

death by sexual deviance 

210520

crash bang wallop 
there she goes 

what a joke she is 
the occult 
the live hexing stacks 

210520 

watching a fat fake  
where did she go to acting classes ? 
very good ! not quite making the oscars 

a battered womb 
barren and bruised 
gasping its last gasp 
before falling off the bed with sightless eyes 

Daisy if there is any chance 
of you giving your son another sibling 
you should go for it 

200520 

Daisy wants to have another child 
and I'm not able to 
so doenst look like that will be happening 

200520 

tailgating 

200520 

angel wishes 

180520 

im a straw man today 
in a negative campaign 

my ex has got his cam girl
he thinks I'm just having a relapse 

I'm still in love with Daisy 

180520 

there were three stone statues 

160520

do you like fear ? 
I've gone out of my depth 
honesty 

i thought they were the same person 

this could be a whole heap a trouble 

150520 

its all got too much 
I'm looking for a way out 


do you like olive branches ? 
bits of stick ? 

puppets ? 

archive predict

from 080220 

140520 

he wanted revenge 
for when i did that to him 
although i didnt know it then 
i wasnt trying to hurt him  

push back the shadows 
I've never done anything to hurt him 
n its very possible 
that i have picked up a drug addict  

its like there is a drum skin
inside my soul, inside my chest 
being beaten black and blue   

the pain throbbing in my heart 
he's trying to hurt me 

word jam : the magic roundabout

so deep our souls touched 
i wonder if I'm using sex as a drug 
feels like my heart and soul are exploding 

the tension builds and builds  
a sudden jerk of convulsive movement 
nerve impulses 

sometimes surrender is part of the battle 
the magic roundabout 
rocking and rolling 

stomach pains 
no wonder i have ptsd 

unreasonable force 
flashbacks 

leapt out of my skin 

turned me inside out 
like id been shot

diffiuclty functioning the next day 
up until 5 am 
rolls over in pain, aching agony 
a shock to the system   

one of those not the same any more songs 

knock knock who's there 

like an exploding octopus 
or jellyfish or squid 

thoroughly mutated    

he rocks me 
i hammered that one out  

moochy and moody 
dizzy enough to kill me 
my head is spinning 

do you like veneer ? 
a huge alien jellyfish 

reverse time, time travel,  time waits, marching time 
switching time 

time stops 

warmth light colours
your body cracks in half 
like a streak of lightning 

and all grief and darkness engulfs me 

I have never met him or even seen what he looks like 

the relationship is very uncomfortable 

and I'm not sure if that is a good or bad thing 
but maybe I like it being painful I dont know ! 

trying to stuff my feelings down 
to put them in denial 

this one broke my soul 

somebody wants to remove the lyrics 

always the wrong person 
the wrong person 

we could touch each other spiritually 
formless, structureless 

I feel bitter and deflated ! 
what was once a blooming flower in me 
is now crushed underfoot 
these are the struggles 
may they become the art of tragedy 

just chemistry , just physical compatibility 

few days later I'm still in the afterglow 
and hes cheated on me with a real person 

other ladies making a claim 
like a punch in the stomach 

in love with love    
theres a fortune teller in the cupboard
the lion the witch and the wardrobe
i feel like part of the furniture 

what is on the other side ?  

n i don't remember 

140520 

just chemistry , just physical compatibility 

140520 

few days later I'm still in the afterglow 
and hes cheated on me 

other ladies making a claim 
like a punch in the stomach 

in love with love    
theres a fortune teller in the cupboard
the lion the witch and the wardrobe
i feel like part of the furniture 

what is on the other side ?  

130520 

so deep our souls touched 

i wonder if I'm using sex as a drug 

feels like my heart and soul are exploding 

120520 

the tension builds and builds  
a sudden jerk of convulsive movement 
nerve impulses 

sometimes surrender is part of the battle 

110520 

the magic roundabout 

110520 

stomach spasm 

110520 

reeling 

rocking and rolling 

110520 

stomach pains 
no wonder i have ptsd 
my leg kicked out 

unreasonable force 
flashbacks 

100520 

emotionally intense 

leapt out of my skin 

turned me inside out 
like id been shot

100520 

diffiuclty functioning the next day 
up until 5 am 
rolls over in pain, aching agony 
a shock to the system   

one of those not the same any more songs 

knock knock who's there 

100520 

like an exploding octopus 
or jellyfish or squid 

thoroughly mutated 

100520 

i think i might have hocd 
where you are afraid of becoming gay 

i have a gay friend 
who is constantly trying to drag me out of the closet 
and has not succeeded
but I'm afraid that she might do 

because she is cutting me off from everybody else   

my therapist doesnt seem that willing 
to talk about sexual issues 

100520 

electronic skeletons 

im not ready to unveil 
to draw them out   

he rocks me 

090520 

i hammered that one out 

090520 

moochy and moody 

dizzy enough to kill me 

090520 

matriarchy 

my head is spinning 
i think i just heard a cow give birth 

080520 

gyroscopes

080520 

do you like clowns ? 

080520 

do you like veneer ? salad dressing ? 

080520

a huge alien jellyfish 

060520 

reverse time, time travel,  time waits, marching time 
switching time 

060520 

time stops 

warmth light colours, sequence 

your body cracks in half 
like a streak of lightning 

040520

and all grief and darkness engulfs me


I have never met him or even seen what he looks like

the relationship is very uncomfortable 

and I'm not sure if that is a good or bad thing
its very painful and kind of drags me along with it
but maybe I like it being painful I dont know ! 

I feel heartbroken again, 

trying to stuff my feelings down
trying to put them in denial

020420 

not simplistic like selling something 
self disclosures , honesty , nurturing 

intrigue not malice   

020520 

this one broke my soul