3pm 

the prescription came through the door 

i was surprised to see it there at all 

1.30pm todays news group 

the Tories found it threatening 

when Russell Brand went round to Ed Millibands house ... 

the right to flee from danger. 

decoys, mules, smuggling , restorative justice 

a beef burglar 

I have felt sometimes oppressed in this country 

but on a different scale 

eg under Gordon Brown

with the community cohesion bandwagons 

you still have to be quite brave to speak up ... 

12.45pm 

the fib sent two men in suits 

to harrass me at the gluten free shop ... 

' you get someone else offering the same services but cheaper ' 

' what i really want is a piece of cheesecake ' 

this was on behalf of my dad 

who wants his drug addicted son attended to 

by someone other than himself ... 

19.19

Im with Davision thanks ... 

I do not consent to my material 

being used in torture scenarios with him 

or to force him back to his childs mother .. . 

20.34

Cashew has just sprayed 

her signature throat virus into my window ... 

1.45pm 

Chucky sent a man in a large car/van 

stopped me on the street to ask where is the police headquarters 

which was just down the road 

pretended not to understand ... 

and delivered some sort of contaminant ... 

apparently my love for Dev is illegal ... 

23.47

a spiritual orgasm ? 

is that an orgasm with a spiritual dimension 

or an orgasm in another part of the body ... 

12.30pm

I was sprayed with sulphuric acid outdoors 

while a young man said ' Caroline Lucas'

this was also from Enders, one of her favourite punishments 

because it harms my voice ... 

they kind of sneaked this through knowing the committee 

would not be all that bothered 

and because i have refused to leave Davision ... 

23.30

this evening 

i had a burning sensation 

in my left thigh 

Collusion

19.37

Collusion chapter : 

Occlusion 

Art Whisperer vol 2

260415   5pm

apparently there is research

that says hugging releases endorphins 

what do they do test your blood pressure ? in a lab ... 

this is why things were better in the 60s and 80s 

people had more contact with each other instead of talking through a screen ... 


270415 1916

cue modern ballet choreographies 

people trying to gesture through massive panes  

with their hands flat on the glass 

and large life size 'tablets' 

where you are trying to read the gestures 

of another dancer on the stage 

12.50pm

mitchigan just wheezed 

which may indicate I'm going to be subject to biological attacks ... 

collusion

she would stroke his chest 

and wrap him in a towel 

as if he was just shipwrecked , 

and put him to bed 

cradled in her arms 



19.53

13.53

Im with Davision thanks ... 


apparently there is a sunday court meeting 

inteding to torture Davision 

ans force hjim to his ex partner 

i do not consent for my materials to be used in this project ... 

Collusion

260415 1.30am 

she held him close 

his long hairy legs like a big spider ...

250415 4pm 

the noise from the neighbours 

keeps me from creating an atmosphere for sex and meditation. 

I used to play music alot until the dispute over the dog ... 

and had a better connection 

between meditation and sex 

either with myself or other people ... 


shame attacks 

affirmations from Louise Hay

replacing parental approval: 

' please could you not comment on my body ' 

they seemed to stop prodding me after that .... 

11.30am 

yesterday i was harassed at the SAA meeting 

by someone from Chucky ... 

' a well versed fool

difficulty keeping my head up 

people medicating themselves with fear ... ' 

this was committee approved 

as a means of forcing me to leave Dev 

this morning there is a virus in the drains ... 

12.27

Baskerville is clapping ... 

maybe himself ... 

his trips to young rent boys might scupper his plans to get off the register ... 

9.32

Im with Davision ... thanks 

apparently they want to torture him today 

and force him to his ex partner 

i do not consent for my materials to be used for this practice ... 

Collusion

19.57

I love you so much 

it is literally not bearable ... 

rehab

180415 5pm

what we get here is unconditional love .. .  

we've come here for the joy of being together 

not to compete or to gain anything ... 

Art Whisperer

230415 

mobile phones have increased our level of servitude to work ... 

vaulting ambition o'er leapt itself ... 



2pm 

Farage is more accessible

with advanced communication skills

more tolerant and able to connect ... 

in his communication skills that is ... 


************

before smart phones 

people had more contact with each other 

and its this directness and connection with other people 

that makes the seventies and eighties so memorable ... 

smart phones have made us very ill mannered ... 




00.09. 240415 

imagine Quadrophenia 

or Kristiane F with smart phones ... 

people having to stop every 5 minutes 

in the middle of an adventure, to answer their phones ... ! 

12.16

are they keeping it from us 

our position in relation to the planets has changed ... 

The Gates

my nephew 

is a fountain of awesomeness ... 

Art Whisperer / Collusion

23.30

puppy eyes 

he proffers his paw 


3pm

not to mention the advertising calls ... 

Im not getting a smart phone 

i value my land line ... 

mobile phones have also made us lose our manners 

its very rude to answer calls when talking to someone in the meat ... 


220415  5.30pm

not to mention 

people in meetings looking all surprised 

by the sound of their meowing vibrating ringtone

having been asked specifically 

to turn it off ... 

schoolgirls scrolling away on the bus 

like theres no tomorrow without a smartphone ... 

Enders ...

21.39

apparently couldn't even bungee jump on stage ! 

20.50

I think Jeremy Clarkson 

should have a chance to apologise 

and be allowed to make a mistake ... 

190415   3.45pm

Chucky had me harassed outside 

with the following actor spam :

without cheese , repeatedly 

meat cut really thin ... 

have you spoken to your friend Rhianna ? 

couging in my direction 

wrapped up x 2 





someone sat next to me in the meeting 

with a virus

i was coughing after all that ... 

Collusion

13.31  190415 

and to massage him 

a journey into his flesh, his soul ... 




19.33

his wet hair 

like the straggly feathers 

of a new born chick 

180415 6pm

its not good for me to hear 

that I'm not doing as well as you'd hoped ... 


keep up ! havent you heard of the slow movement ... 

Collusion ... new series ...

23.08  180415 

she appears to be in some kind of difficulty ... 

19.08

these days 

even the younger generation 

agree that we were cool ... 

cherry blossom no leaves 

2pm  160415 

Ed needs media training 

like Andy Murray did ... 

the justification for the Iraq war 

apparenlty was that terrorists were spilling over the border 


Maybe the Saudis treat their women 

in an archaic way 

but if we intervene then we are also interfering ... 


and what really is the difference 

between using the military presence and international policing ? 

19.10  yes 

150415 12.45pm 

i thought surveillance cameras 

were being used to view women in their bedrooms 

so its like 'watch this ya bastards' ... ! 




with my grandmothers 

its like i ve healed and I've got these lovely memories of them 

so i feel them inside, 

im not really talking about a ghost ... 


the place where my mother should be 

is a gaping black hole 

that makes me vulnerable to addictions and dangerous people ... 


' her victory makes her sisters defeat seem all the more bitter ' ... Paolo Coelho 

I not only have survivors guilt around my mothers death 

but also around my brothers addiction ... 



12.20

i find that softening my gaze 

and not trying too much i do the word search quicker 

than i do using a methodical way ... 




tied together with Ben 

a little Buddha 

tied down with other peoples needs 

11.24

her to my left ? 

150415   23.50

mitchigan mouldy drain fumes ...

" Dear Ben

sorry if i havent always learned to respect your wild and beautiful spirit

as you know i am not always very well myself

especially just now they are trying to take me off the lorazepam .

Sometimes i don't have anything to give ...

Im hoping we will go for a coffee sometime with your son

maybe when i am feeling up to it

i will let you know

all the best with your mysterious journey in life

I couldn't pretend to understand you

and with age i realise more how little i know

and i always do love you

you matter very much to me and i don't want to lose you ...

that would cause me unbearable pain


love from Liz and Myra "


"I don't always know how to respect your wild and beautiful spirit

and i am not always well myself

especially just now they are trying to take me off the lorazepam .

Sometimes i don't have anything to give ... "


I sometimes feel jealous of him

like he's a really cool musician for instance

and very expressive with his feelings

very 'present' with other people

very funny , that sort of thing, life and soul of the party ...

I don't know, its a bit of step 4

sometimes i feel like I'm jealous of him

and then i patronise him as though i am superior

im a bit confused about this at the moment

because there are so many sick people in my life

that sometimes i have to patronise people

or ignore them, or give some indication that they are invading my space ...

ps very deeply ingrained conditioning this ...

like growing up in an all white community in London

you know, where i was a high flyer

i have a built in sense of superiority

coupled with a feeling of worthlessness

that comes from not understanding your true values ... lif

18.23

there is a committee decision 

to deport Davision tonight 

and force him back to his childs mother 

I do not consent for my materials to be used in this 

Im with Davision thanks ... 




possibly the fib derailed the empty train at Brighton 

this afternoon ... 

they wanted me to take longer to get home ... 

17.39

cherry blossoms but no leaves ... 

7.52

Im with Davision ... 

150415 00.20

you just have to bite the bullet 

and cut it in half ... 

21.18

Im with Davision thanks ... 

18.58

she loved sponging him in the bath 

and cleaning under his hairy arms 

n she would lick him like an ice cream ... 

23.56

the signal is bad 

on channel 12 ( Dave ) and channel 29 ( E4 + 1 ) ... 

my brother ... 

I sometimes feel jealous of him

like he's a really cool musician for instance

and very expressive with his feelings

very 'present' with other people

very funny , that sort of thing, life and soul of the party ...





he's like Kurt Cobain you know ...

very unique

and very different from everyone else in the family

and Kurt Cobain also killed himself with heroin ...

22.17

someoen has just fired viral darts through the window 

also there was another viral attack 

while i was asleep this morning 

and enders harrassed me outside with the following spam ... 

children called Jacob and Patsy 

and a suit saying he was lazy ... 





this current virus feels like one of Cashews 

12.37

Im with Davision 

11.04.15. 5pm

some people need to learn to discriminate 

between meditation and Isis ... 

Enders harrassed me outside today 

with the following spam actors :

3pm those green cups can be relegated to the shed 

woman in green said sorry to me in the toilets 

3.30pm 

skirts do not fit me 

3.35 the drains getting blocked 

3.40

your legs are younger than mine 

and your feet stronger 

Sorry to hear that you need to be with someone unavailable ...


and that you find rejection painful

maybe thats what I'm doing

partly as you say because of family patterns

and also in my case because I'm not really well enough for a relationship

and i don't know if i ever will be

so the internet thing kind of suits me that way

7.30am

a virus has been sprayed into my bedroom

this seems to happen every time i masturbate ... 



apparently my knowing about this 

makes me a paranoid schizophrenic ... 

7pm

enders had me harassed on the train 

with actors ...

'I'm really looking forward to facing the judicial system 

here in England

a world filled with maniacs ...' 

Scrabble with Rob 100415 

kappa cloth made from leaves , zea corn silk, zo breed of yak , go, guy, pe, be, pity, qi variant of chi , 

phi 21st greek letter ,  viced 

110415 4pm 

my relationship 

is like an emotional chess game

this time i don't feel abandoned or traumatised 

just people seem to think I'm stronger than i am ... 

how do you incorporate your fantasies about other people 

into a committed relationship ? 

are you really not going to act out at all ? 

we can't meet at the moment 

because of the position I'm in and the position he is in 

it wouldn't be appropriate 

I guess some people would call this an imaginary friend ... 




I felt i had a positive experience with my sexuality this week 

and this led to feelings of utter utter terror ... 

as if people would attack me for feeling good about myself ... 

12.58

I dreamed that i was in a council flat 

the bath and toilet leaked all over the floor 

and i was at risk of being attacked by the neighbours ... 

8.50pm 

thunderwear 

18.41

so I'm expected to return to Fritzle ...

my cousin said i would learn to love him ... 

9.30am

the fib honked outside my window 

to indicate that it was they that made my advocate unwell ... 

and have done the internet interference 

the reason is that they want me to return my affections to Joseph Fritzle 

he said he can kill people by messing about with them through the authorities ... 

apparently the anglo american community have voted for this 

and have given the fib a licence to dog me 

23.46

I just had to re-start the router again 

and make a phone call to BT

tomorrow i have to re-set the router apparently 

i reckon someone is putting bugs down the line ... 

this is a fib technique 

apparently in this case supported by the British community 




i also have cold sores 

and wonder if Baskerville has been to see his rent boys ... 

1pm

I thought Milliband 

would gain points on the non dom tax thing 

and lose them on the referendum ...